Racism, Hatred, Peace, Justice

I am someone that loves to stay up on current events.

I am also someone that loves to try to see things from different angles. I feel that this ultimately makes my own convictions stronger and also helps me keep an open mind to where I need to reevaluate my own position, always, always through the lens of love, faith, and striving for sanctity.

As I've been watching the events unfold in Ferguson, Missouri, my initial reaction was, like many, to pronounce judgement. How could that white officer just shoot and kill that young black man? He was just a kid. My heart was filled with sorrow.

But I never like to jump on the social media bandwagon, no matter what the issue is.

I have seen the reaction of media, Catholic leaders, speakers, musicians, friends, strangers, etc.

I have seen people say that you can't have an opinion on this that isn't 100% against Officer Wilson if you are white.

People... no matter your race, if you see things in the lens of black and white races, you will never see things through the eyes of Christ.

I reeled back from the vehemently hateful and angry responses, the vitriol which surprised me, spewing out of the mouths of people whose knowledge of the case comes from headlines and social media. I did my own research and I realized...

You know what... we need to take a breath. And we need to be patient. We need to wait for the investigation before we hang the officer for his crime, error in judgement, murder, self-defense, whatever it may have been, in his mind, at that time.

Before anyone feels the urge to slam me, please finish reading.

I am not a racist. My father is Mexican, my mother is Anglo, my sisters are Hispanic, African American, and Caucasian. My father in law is Italian and Irish and my mother in law is Puerto Rican. My family is a rainbow. We are all different religions, different socio-economic backgrounds, etc. I consider myself very open minded. Every summer was spent in inner city Memphis in the projects working with the Missionary Sisters of Charity. I stand by my beliefs in what is morally right or wrong, but I am actively trying to see past where we are different and try to see the human dignity in every person.

I do this because I have realized a tendency in myself -- which I have worked so hard to overcome, with incredible help from my holy husband -- to let anger turn into hatred.

This is how our hearts are hardened...

Someone has wronged you. You are angry, rightly so. Everyone tells you that you have a right to be angry. You keep talking about it, reliving it. You are unwilling to forgive until reparation is made. You hold onto the anger like you will lose your passion for justice if you let it go. You feed it with other people's anger. The anger becomes harder and more intense. It grows and occupies most of your thoughts throughout the day. You become filled with hate. You start to view others with suspicion. If anyone doesn't affirm your righteous anger, you see them as an enemy. The anger builds until it becomes how you see the world. A world not filled with love and hope, but desolation and destruction.

It destroys you.

This is what is happening in Ferguson. And this is happening to those of us who have already cast the stone at Officer Wilson's feet.

Here's the unfortunate thing... you seek justice, but will never find peace.

Luke 6:34-35 "If you lend to those from whom you expect to receive, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners in order to receive back the same amount. 35"But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return; and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High; for He Himself is kind to ungrateful and evil men. 36"Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.

I do not know what happened that night and to assume so would be fairly foolish.

"What is your source?" 

"Uh, the nightly news, YouTube, and Twitter." 

"Were you an eyewitness?"

 "No, but I saw some video footage on Fox AND MSNBC, so it must be true." 

"Do you know Officer Wilson personally?"

"No, but he's a white man and white policemen are known to be racist."

"Do you know Michael Brown personally?"

"No, but he was college bound."

While it may seem clear to some that this case is cut and dried, I challenge you to wait for the details. The more you are convicted without investigation, the less you are open to truth. 

I have experienced racism. My family has experienced racism. I have experienced sexism. I have experienced ageism. I have experienced discrimination based on the fact that I am Catholic. Other Christian churches practically put the scarlet letter on me when someone comes up to ask if I would speak at their church and then discover I am Catholic. Discrimination and Racism are realities of the world we live in, because people are more comfortable with people who are more like them. It's not just a white issue. It's a... being human issue. 

Those filling their social media with hateful proclamations of racism and judgement are guilty of doing the same thing they claim Officer Wilson did -- rushing to attack. 

One of the most beautiful responses I saw to this entire thing was a girl who was in my small group at a youth retreat awhile ago. She is now a young, married mother. A black woman who serves our country in the US Army. This is part of what she said: 

I know the world is crazy and lost its mind but my friends.. Please stop blaming "white folks" my father, the man on my birth certificate, that I knew up until 12...a white man. My maiden name is from a white man. I went to an all white school, when I graduated and when into the army a white family took me in. My daughter recognizes a white man and white woman as grandparents.. Let's not forget to mention.. My "white" education was supported by my black mother...and Im adopted.. So that white man and black woman TOGETHER chose me and my black brother... But I bet you wouldn't know it by looking at me...... Humans are humans you cannot blame corruption and sin on white people or color just because they are the ones the media chooses to highlight. 

I know this girl, and when she speaks out, she is speaking out with the intent and desire to love people more deeply regardless of race, sin, sex, creed, corruption. Her words in seeking justice are out of love. 

Please, especially those who have lots of influence by your position in society, the Church, school, etc. Please reevaluate how you have been reacting to this tragic situation, from one of anger and hatred, to one of mercy and love. Come together and pray for Michael Brown and Officer Wilson. Come and pray and work so that there doesn't have to be so much tension between people and police, white and black, Mexican, Catholic, Protestant, Atheist, etc. 

Pray for humility. Pray to see people as Jesus sees them. Ask for help to forgive. Pray to love people as Jesus loves them. Love the people in your life, forgive the people in your life. Pray to be a person of peace. 

There are no saints that withheld forgiveness, going to their death in an angry tirade for justice, taunting their persecutors. Passionate for justice truly means passionate for peace, love, and mercy. 

Love and mercy have to be regular disciplines of His disciples. And that's hardcore. Way harder than throwing a brick into a store window, yelling and screaming about injustice, and sending Officer Wilson to his own death. 

It will never help a heart to repent or to love you. 

It has a greater chance of making them hate you. 

It will never help you to love, but only increase your own hatred. 

I, myself, have been praying for my own areas in life that I need to forgive and let go of anger, so believe me, this is a journey we are all on together. 

I am still recovering from the anger in my previous blog... 

My whole body was tense, knots in my stomach, sleepless nights. While I have every right to be angry and believe me, this fight for advocacy for adequate mental health treatment that is not dictated by insurance companies and hospital policies over people isn't over... I realize I need to take a breath, focus, and figure out what I can do. What I CAN DO. Not just a general rant of "what should be done" but what I myself, with the connections that I have, the gifts that I have, the ministry that I have, am capable of doing. 

I already am working on it, friends. Please pray for me too. 

I'm not asking anyone to give up the fight for justice. I am asking you to understand what justice, through the eyes of faith really is. And it is framed in love and peace. Not hatred and division. 

Praying for Ferguson. Praying for my friends who are truly hurting because of this tragedy. 

Lord, make me an instrument of Your peace. Where there is hatred, let me sow love; where there is injury, pardon; where there is doubt, faith; where there is despair, hope; where there is darkness, light; where there is sadness, joy.

O, Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console; to be understood as to understand; to be loved as to love; For it is in giving that we receive; it is in pardoning that we are pardoned; it is in dying that we are born again to eternal life.

The Breakdown of Humanity on Facebook

Sigh.

My heart broke again today as I learned that Zelda, Robin Williams' daughter, was run off from her social media accounts due to the harassment and negative messages she was receiving from others. It is absolutely unacceptable that she should receive anything at all other than love and support. What the heck is wrong with people?

Then I see this video in which a Pastor calls out those rioting in the streets of Ferguson, Missouri and the African American leaders who show up for the press conferences, but then disassociate themselves from their own communities. While the Pastor is addressing exclusively the African American community in his message, I can't help but feel that his message is one that applies to all of us. If you watch the video, it's intense, but you'll understand. Don't think that message just applies to one group of people - it applies to all of us.

You see, social media, in my opinion, has led to the breakdown in respect for all authority. Social media makes you a leader without earning it. How many friends or followers we have gives us this false sense of authority and leadership. You gain followers, friends, and likes -- for what? Posting a duck-face selfie? I'm not opposed to duck faced selfies, I just can't pull it off.

In fact, when I take a photo, I delete it if I wouldn't put it on Facebook.

Remember when you took pictures and what you got is what you got? I have practically a whole envelope of pictures from Myrtle Beach with my thumb in each photo.

The opposite is also true. No likes equates with no one likes me or cares about me. No event invitations means no one wants me. It becomes a deeply felt rejection. No likes on my photo means I'm ugly.

Social media has also given us a platform to post our expert opinions regardless of whether or not we are experts in the matter. This has led us to unprecedented narcissism on a mass scale. How many likes we get equates with how right we are. I remember being in a debate once - a friendly exchange, but nonetheless a debate - and those who were reading our comments were "liking" the comment they agreed with. If the other person had more likes than I did, I felt in some way I had lost the argument. If I had more likes, I equated it with victory!

This. Is. Insane!!!!!

In every hot topic issue these days, all of a sudden EVERYONE is an expert. Our experiences all of a sudden are scientific data. Our feelings equate with truth and no one can sift through to find the flaws in our logic or statements because this is "our" Facebook page and we will just delete your comments or unfriend you. *Not me, I am speaking in general. I've only ever unfriended a couple of people and it wasn't because they disagreed with me, it was because of harassment.* I welcome friendly disagreements and intellectual debates. The unfortunate thing is that nowadays our only research to form opinions seems to rest entirely on what "most people" believe. Very few have a conviction that they stand by - as soon as everyone starts changing their profile picture, they jump on the bandwagon even if they have no idea what it means!  At one point, "most people" believed the earth was flat. Popular opinion is not always right, and in fact given the recent mass hysteria we have seen in so many news stories of late, we can see it is often wrong. People react, then defend their feelings on the matter, then maybe, maybe do some research. We have seen a total breakdown in critical thinking.

We conduct ourselves in the most asinine ways on social media sometimes. People have the guts, carelessness, motivation, impulsiveness, drive, whatever it's called, to say things in a manner that they would never say face to face. Sometimes it is in the name of "truth". Sometimes it is in the name of religion or creed. Sometimes it is meant to genuinely enlighten someone, but because of the venom with which it is written it can't be seriously taken. And don't get me started on the passive aggressive postings which are posted with enough ambiguity to let us feel innocent of calling someone out, but enough bait to draw them in and tick them off.

OY.

So.....

I didn't write this post just to spew a bunch of venomous feelings and opinions and duck faced selfies.

I am writing this post to challenge us to take our message to the streets, in essence. Get out from behind our social media faces and actually be real friends with real people.

Our son embarrassed us today by yelling out "That lady is SCARY!". "That Lady" was within earshot and we immediately shushed him and explained that we don't say those things about people.

"Why?" he asked.

"Because that lady is God's kid."

That person that is really saying some inciteful, not insightful, things is God's kid.

That person who is posting their love for everything you deem wrong in the world, is God's kid.

That person who annoys you in real life and virtual life, is God's kid.

Instead of talking about what's wrong with the world, let's BE what is right in the world. Like the Pastor in the video above said... WE have to change US.

Rather than try to convince someone that he or she is wrong on a subject, let's start practicing charity. Let's ask ourselves, would I say this, in this way, to this person if they were standing right in front of me? And if it gets heated, as the Pastor says, HUMBLE thyself, and back down.

And please don't say, "I'll pray for you."

Just do it.

Then you can giggle sneakily and say, "Hehehe, I prayed for that person and they didn't even know it!"

Especially if you profess to love the Lord, let your truths be laced in virtue. God is love. Sure, He turned over tables. But He also loved people - not the fluffy everything-you-do-is-great-you're-so-great kind of love, but the love that caused people to change because with all their hearts they wanted the kind of love that loved them where they were at, but challenged them to be better. I'm not advocating tolerance. Tolerance is the inadequate substitute for love and often very much the opposite. Tolerance says, just do your thing, I don't care, you can't strive for more or better. Love says you are worth so much and while I may not agree with you or your choices, I have the utmost care for you as a child of God.

Emotional posts from someone who is just really praying for more love in this broken-hearted world.

Love you all,
Noelle