Why, God?

Whoever invented taxes was a jerk.

"Hmm... I really think we should be providing this service and paying for my salary... how should I do this.. OH I'll force people to pay me."

Ok, I get it, there are lots of benefits to taxes... roads, schools, libraries, civil/public services, firemen, police, and other important stuff.

But dang.

Alas was my sticker shock when I went to renew my license plate tags.

"That will be $523.27, " she said.

First of all, if I was asking for that money for a dang sticker on someone's car, I'd be handing them a glass of wine simultaneously.

"What? Five dollars and twenty-three cents?" I said.

"No, $523.27."

"What? FIVE HUNDRED? FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS?!" I said as I pulled my chin off the floor.

"Yes, FIVE TWO THREE POINT TWO SEVEN."

I just about burst into tears.

All I kept thinking was something about death and taxes and I'm so ready to live in a tent somewhere on an island with my family. An island with bountiful fruit trees.

Oy.

Why, God? Why can't we ever seem to get ahead?
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I went to our family Holy Hour by myself today and as I was praying the Joyful Mystery of the Rosary (When the angel Gabriel announces to Mary that she is to be the Mother of God). I noticed that she asks, "How can this be, since I have no relations with a man?"

She asks, "How can this be?" How can this happen?

I reflected on other times that the people in the Bible ask the Lord, "How can this be?"

One is 2 Kings 4:43 But his servant said, “How can I set this before a hundred people?” So he repeated, “Give it to the people and let them eat, for thus says the Lord, ‘They shall eat and have some left.’”

One is in John 6, I am the living bread which has come down from heaven. Anyone who eats this bread will live for ever; and the bread that I shall give is my flesh, for the life of the world.'

52 Then the Jews started arguing among themselves, 'How can this man give us his flesh to eat?'

53 Jesus replied to them: In all truth I tell you, if you do not eat the flesh of the Son ofman and drink his blood, you have no life in you.

Jesus says He is the Bread of Life and His followers ask, "How can this be?" How can this happen?

Then of course there is doubting Thomas. Poor Thomas. He just wanted proof of the Lord's resurrection. 

In each of these instances of someone asking the Lord, "How can this be?" He gives them explanations. He never says, "Shut up and just do what I say." Even though, really, the fact that He instructed us to do something should be enough for us to, well, do it. But He doesn't operate like that. 

He answers their questions. I never noticed that before. I always dwelt on Mary's humble submission and Thomas' lack of faith. The Lord says, "Blessed are they who have not seen and yet believe." I thought that meant that to question God is somehow sinful. 

But, the Lord asks us to have faith like a child. When my children ask "Why?" it is because they seek truth and they seek understanding. It's not that they don't trust me, it's that they genuinely want to know the answers. That's the kind of faith we are called to have. 

Faith, sometimes, seems like it's blind. We get caught up in advocating trust and surrender in this sort of passive, blind way. The Lord shows us in these passages that it is okay to cry out, "Why God?" or to ask Him "How can this be?" He isn't a magician who refuses to part with his secrets. He is an all-knowing God who sees the bigger picture beyond what we are capable of, allowing us to ask why and bringing us the answers we need and the signs of hope in Him.

So if you're wondering what the heck is going on in your life, ask Him. 

There is a distinctive attitude difference between Mary and Thomas, though, that is key to our questioning... 

Mary was open, but Thomas had already decided he would not believe -- " But he said to them, “Unless I see the mark of the nails in his hands, and put my finger in the mark of the nails and my hand in his side, I will not believe.”

We have to be open. When we ask, "Why, God?" We have to be ready for the Truth. We have to seek the Truth. We have to be open to the Truth. Not our truth - His Truth. 

Many times this cry occurs during a tragic time and can easily lead us to despair. We can probably all look back on points in our lives and see how what was once so terrible, has made and shaped us in some way, hopefully for the better. What once seemed insurmountable, we have overcome.  If we seek out answers, not just guided by our feelings at the moment, but really an openness to what God is calling us to, we will have peace, and He will give us the assurance we need. 

I hope and pray that walking as people of faith, we realize it isn't a blind-folded trust walk. It is an active following the Lord where He leads, eyes open and fixed on Him. It is a choice that calls us to put one foot in front of the other. It is a trust that bears fruit in understanding, joy, and peace. 

Praying for all of you who still have to renew your taxes in Ford County, Kansas. I'm already starting to save up for next year...

Why, God? 

:)